*********BEWARE! This is a long post.*********
I am not one who has regrets. I stand easily beside any decision I have made in the past, whether I think it to be the “right” decision or not. This is not to say that I think I am the model of perfection but an example of feeling secure and confident.
A lot of my time lately has been spent thinking about decision making. Why do people make bad choices? How do they know if they are making right choices? Why do we punish ourselves for making poor choices but do not reward ourselves for making good choices?
For many things we choose, there is typically a strong right or wrong decision, which typically comes down to courtesy or truthfulness. Help someone with a heavy load, return a lost wallet, brush our teeth in the morning –yes that comes down to civility, too.
It should be easy for people to make these choices and if everyone made the right decision, the world would be a much nicer, cordial place. This is the part where I’m daydreaming about a perfect world.
The other choices we make are evidence of who we are as individuals and may or may not affect others. While I may choose to wear dangerously tall shoes while walking the streets of NYC all day, it does not affect anyone else but
is a choice I would make. A bad choice to say the least; although I know I would do it again, which is a reflection of me. (Sometimes fashion decisions can be both bad and good at the same time.) Or I may decide to not stop for gas, resulting in the need of someone else’s assistance. This is a bad decision that affects someone else and is
clearly something I would do. **Side note: this only has to happen once to realize it will never happen again.
Choices I make for work usually fall into the latter category. Building codes, fire safety codes, ADA codes prohibit me from making terrible decisions that are harmful to the public. The choices I make about carpet patterns, wallcovering texture, and paint color are generally simple choices because it either fits together or it doesn’t. Other decisions like furniture or light fixture selection is typically pretty simple, too. Does the chair sit comfortably? Will this pendant produce enough light? Is the style appropriate for the interior architecture? These choices affect others productivity and it is extremely important for clients and their staff to feel comfortable in their surroundings and have things at their convenience.
Back to the topic: feeling secure and confident in decision making. When making decisions that affect others it’s important to ask ourselves one simple question: how is this decision more beneficial than the other option? A client might ask me why I recommend a particular chair over another. If the decision I made was truly the right one, it should be easy for me to rattle off why this chair is the one for them. "The chair is perfect because it is has pneumatic height, has strong casters that will not track the new carpet, has an ergonomic back adjustment to be personalized for each user, has adjustable arms that slide under the table, and comes in a wide variety of upholstery options." I can make my choice sound wonderful, even if it is not the right decision. This chair could be too modern for the space and could really change the appearance of the room but it has so many other wonderful qualities that it cannot be overlooked. It sounds like I’m suggesting lying but I’m really not. It’s about backing up decisions with a solid foundation.
Personal decisions I make are generally more difficult to support because my needs and wants are skewed, as they are for many. I may feel that I need to buy a new lip-gloss because I do not have a particular color or one with such glitter, but do I truly need it? Or do I just want it because it’s pretty?
The reason for this post is because I have had to make a lot of decisions lately. A lot of decisions at work as well as a lot of personal decisions that I wish I could share. I made a pretty poor decision that I should regret because it does affect other people. I told myself a long time ago to live life in each moment and not to be disappointed in choices I made and I have held to that, which makes me feel confident in myself. For this decision, I considered the consequences and was aware of what could happen with this bad decision but still made the bad decision, which I have realized is the wrong decision. (There is definitely a difference between a bad decision and a wrong decision but that is a completely different post.) Not once did I think about what would happen if I made the right decision. I did not take my own advice and see both sides of both choices- the pro’s of the good decision, the pro’s of the bad decision, the con’s of the good decision, the con’s of the bad decision. I only considered the bad decision. It’s like I already knew what choice I was going to make…
Anyways, I just really needed to let my fingers type for a long period of time because it’s kind of like therapy for me. Hopefully one day I will not be as embarrassed by this decision and I will be able to share it more openly.
x’s and o’s
